Our pumpkins!

37 Weeks!!!!!!

PregnancyStats:

How Far Along: 37 weeks
Total Weight Gain/Loss: Ugh. 44lbs. Oh well. It's worth it!!!
Maternity Clothes: Whatever fits!
Best Moment this week: When my doctor told me I was 3 cm dilated!!!
Gender: Allllll boy....it's been verified 3 times!
Movement: He's dropped, so my ribs are getting a little bit of a break (key words, a little bit). He's still all over the place, but I like it like that!
Food Craving: Coffeeeeeeeeeee
What I miss: Not feeling like an old woman....I have so many aches and pains, you'd think i was 65 and sleeeeeep!!!
What I am looking forward to: The special day between now and 2 weeks! I can't wait. It's even more exciting because of how excited Sydni is. She never stops talking about it!!
Symptoms: Rib pain, back pain, hands are swollen and hurt soooo bad especially at night, heartburn, swollen and sore feet and I waddle, and I don't sleeeeeep :-( Also, pelvic pain. Holy pelvis. And I'm having menstrual like cramps.
Exercise: I'm scared of exercise now because of Lactic Acidosis!! So I still just hang out at home. Everything feels like exercise to me.

I'm counting down the days!! Less than 2 weeks to go and I can't wait!!!!

What an ignorant bitch.

Yeah, I said it. She's an ignorant bitch. Check out with this dumbass said.

http://www.marieclaire.com/sex-love/dating-blog/overweight-couples-on-television?click=main_sr#comments

Okay, so now that you've read it, wtf??? Was she trying to come off as an insensitive bitch??? I mean, I can't even think of another word to call her....okay I can, but I won't let those colors show yet.

And then her apology? Okay, so she apologized. I'm pretty sure as a writer you brainstorm, rough draft, re draft, edit, proof read, re edit and then final read.....AND SHE STILL THOUGHT IT WAS OKAY! DAMN! So for me, fake apology. PLUS....how did that get by the main editor who edits everything? Like way to sell the name "Marie Claire" or alienate the name from all women, because who wants to put up with that shit????

And this (my opinion) all coming from a person (myself) who isn't overweight and that still pisses me off! Ugh. I'm disgusted.

Rant over....I think.

Love love love her.

I thought I'd post some of my favorite pictures of Syd from when she was little.

This is just us taking a Christmas picture 2 months early....

This is a day or two after we came

home from the hospital. I call it a bear hug.

This is when she was about a week old.

This picture is hanging in her room with

"There is always love in Daddy's hands" written on it.

This was just a funny day....she was making all of these funny faces!!

She just looks so innocent in this one! I love it!

This is when we went to visit my grandparents.

My Grandpa decided to take a nap with her. I love

this picture, and the lighting just makes it that much better.

This is at my Grandparents house, too.

This is her first Christmas Eve. She was full of smiles!

funny right?

This is a painting that we received from one

of Jimmy's good friends for our wedding gift.

The photo below is what he painted.

Beautiful!

My mom was taking pictures of her, and she

decided to make this hilarious face!!!

This would be a repeat face I'd see quite often from her.

I call it her poo face. She made it all the time!


And this is my pretty princess!!!! She loves Snow White!

This and that, and that and this....

Well let's see. What's new. Oh wait, Sydni is sick again! I swear those germ-ridden children at school need to learn how to wash their hands, and their parents need to keep them home if they're sick!! GEEZ!!! Hopefully it's just a couple day thing. She has a low grade temp, a cough and a sore throat. BUT....she isn't so sick that she doesn't have time to play.

This is what she likes to do....and I have no idea. She stuffs her leggings with beanie babies and waddles around. I know...it's weird. But that's Syd!


Next. Let's see. I am 1 cm dilated!!! I know, big deal, right? Well it's better than being no cm!!! I'm hoping that on Wednesday (my next appt) that I'm at least 1 1/2 or 2....ya know, progress....because if I'm still one that will really bum me out. My doctor said that if he could pick the best time for me to go in labor, it would be at 38 weeks, so that Liam has plenty of time to mature, but not enough time to gain 2 extra pounds!! I'm okay with that! That would leave me with about 10ish days! YAHOOOOO!!

So my hbv medicine is doing well I think. I'm not sure of how well it's lowering my viral load, but it's not making me feel as bad as I thought. It gives me a headache and makes me sleepy, but that should get better after I have Liam, because being pregnant by itself is exhausting!!

We've been keeping busy with Kindergarten, errands, getting the house ready for a baby, dance class, all that good stuff! This next week will be pretty busy, too. We have a Halloween party to go to, parent teacher conferences (oh man, that's a whole other story...maybe later), Halloween, maybe a baby!!!! And Sydni has a 5 day weekend! Too bad Jimmy doesn't have a 5 day weekend, too. :-(

I think that's it for now...or at least for this entry!!

36 Weeks

PregnancyStats:

How Far Along: 36 weeks
Total Weight Gain/Loss: Oh my....probably way more than last week. But that's okay. Worse things could happen besides gaining a little extra weight :-)
Maternity Clothes: Well it's been warmer this last week, so I've been wearing sundresses.
Best Moment this week: When I started my hbv medication. Yay for me and Liam!
Gender: Allllll boy....it's been verified 3 times!
Movement: He's dropped, so my ribs are getting a little bit of a break (key words, a little bit). He's still all over the place, but I like it like that!
Food Craving: Starbucks. YUM.
What I miss: Not feeling like an old woman....I have so many aches and pains, you'd think i was 65.
What I am looking forward to: The special day between now and 4 weeks! I can't wait. It's even more exciting because of how excited Sydni is. She never stops talking about it!!
Symptoms: Rib pain, back pain, hands are swollen and hurt soooo bad especially at night, heartburn, swollen and sore feet and I waddle, and I don't sleeeeeep :-(
Exercise: I'm scared of exercise now because of Lactic Acidosis!! So I still just hang out at home. Everything feels like exercise to me.

I'm counting down the days!! Less than 4 weeks to go and I can't wait!!!!

well, it's getting better

Ah yes. Lamivudine-hbv aka Epivir-hbv. How I loathe you.

Side effects I suffer from:
- Headache
-Dizziness
-Fatigue
-Possible swelling of hands.

Might I mention that 90% of the possible side effects of this medication are also possible things I might experience being pregnant. Oh joy.

The scariest side effects or complications from the medicine?
-Lactic Acidosis. Lactic acidosis is when lactic acid builds ups in the blood stream faster than it can be removed. Lactic acid is produced when oxygen levels in the body drop. --The medicine can do that.....awesome....because it can be fatal.

-My hbv strain(s) can become resistant to the medication.

-My hbv can become way worse (or better) after I stop taking the medicine. How unfair.

Positives

--Liam is getting what he needs, because the lower my viral load, the better off he is.
--Liam is almost here!!!! 4 or less weeks!!
--I am better off, because the longer my enzymes and my viral load are high, the more damage done to my body.

Somebody likes me up there...

Well let's just start by saying THANK YOU GOD!

From my last post until now, 10000000000 things have happened. All have been better than I could've imagined (and believe me, I was imagining some pretty shitty stuff).

My Hepatologist thought my numbers were really high, but that they were directly related to the pregnancy, so he has put me on Lamivudine. It's a Hep B medication that is COMPLETELY safe in pregnancy. The reason for taking the medication to lower my levels so that it's less likely for him to contract the disease from me. I was told that even if I only take it for a week, it could make a huge difference. YAHOO!

Next, I was also told that the medicine would cost me a fortune...which I don't have. Luckily I have family that can support such an expense.....BUT when I spoke with the pharmacist today I was told it would only cost me $40!! And not hundreds or thousands!! YAHOO!!!

Next, I was told by my ob, that Liam would require a little extra surveillance after he was born.....I didn't know what this meant..watching his heart rate? His breathing? I had no idea. When I asked my ob, he said his electrolytes. YAHOO!! That's better than what I was thinking!

For myself, I have to take the medication until I see my hepatologist in February. I also have to get my bloodwork done every month instead of every 6 months. However, he does think this is directly pregnancy related and that after I have him, my levels should go back to around where they were (which was low 1000's and my liver enzymes were at a normal level). I'm hoping that this is true. But if not, I just hope that Liam doesn't get it and he will be Hep B free like Sydni.

I do know that I can't breast-feed while on the medicine because of how it changes through breast-feeding. Hard to explain, but if that's the case then that's what it'll be. I'd rather him be happy and safe and be formula fed, then sick with potentially toxic breast milk.

Whew. So to sum it up...
- I start taking Lamivudine.
- The medicine lowers my viral load which at the same time will lower my enzyme levels
- My load and levels are lessened, which lowers his chances of getting it.
- It's not going to cost me an arm and a leg.
- I get more frequent check ups to see if my levels are lowering with medicine after I deliver him.
- I can't breast-feed, but that's okay.

I couldn't feel better about the situation. I was so overwhelmed, especially since my whole pregnancy has been a roller coaster, and I'm so glad that this is working out in a way that should be beneficial for the both of us.

Just when I thought things were looking up....

Oh my. Trying to figure out how to even explain this is hard. But I will try.

When I was pregnant with Sydni I found out that I had Hepatitis B. The general consensus is that I contracted from my birth mother, and since it's so common in Asian countries, this all makes sense. If the disease is contracted from mother to child and there are no interventions (immune globulin [given to babies born from mothers who have HepB] or vaccinations) then that likelihood that a newborn with an immune system of....well a newborn, can fight it off is unlikely. So, as of present day I still have it and that's why.

Now it sounds selfish....why would I choose to get pregnant again if I know that my new baby can contract the disease? Well after speaking with my OB and my Hepatologist it was made clear that if I wanted to have another baby, the younger I am and the less active my disease is, the better. Well it happens to be that my disease was at a low level of activity (I'll explain later) and that the time seemed like the best. When a baby is born to a mom of HepB, the baby receives a special shot called Immune Globulin. This shot reduces the likelihood of the baby contracting HepB (along with the first shot of HepB vaccincation at birth) to 1-5%. The sooner they get the shot (literally from 30 minutes to 5 minutes, makes a huge difference. However, the higher the viral load (or count) of the HepB in the mother, the more it matters about how quickly the shot is given. And, with that said it also matters because the higher the viral load, the higher the percentage that the baby will contract the disease even if they get those shots.

So....my predicament? Well since I found out I have it, and started getting my viral load checked, as well as my liver enzymes (which kind of gives a quick glimpse of whether or not the disease is damaging your liver) and other antigen and antibody tests, my overall results have been between an inactive carrier and an active carrier. The difference between the two is that an inactive carrier shows positive for the disease, but has a low viral load, regular liver enzyme counts, and the bad antigens are negative or nonreactive. I've had a liver biopsy to check my liver quality (in 2009) and it was healthy.

Well, I now get checked every 6 months. I got checked in June of this year and my viral load went down from 12000 to 6000. At first I thought those numbers were high, but I was told by my doctor that high numbers are in the millions and that my numbers were nothing to really worry about especially since my liver enzymes were in normal range and that all of my antigens weren't positive. Well, I just got bloodwork done last week and got my results last night and I was crushed. My viral load was 2,941,107....yes that's right, that number is in the millions....My liver enzymes were 128 and 130......whereas my last count was 16 and 18. High is considered above 30. My antigen that has been negative for a few years is positive.

Not only am I concerned about my life, but also my babies. I feel guilty. I just pray that he will respond to the shots even though my count is against him. Now, let me also say that my hepatologist warned me that my hepatitis could react in many different ways to being pregnant. It could stay the same, lessen or rise. So Maybe it just started rising because of the pregnancy? On top of all of this, there are other factors that can play a role now, too. Something called ICP, which occurs in 1% of pregnancies, but the 1% mostly consists of people with liver diseases, and Acute Fatty Liver which occurs in pregnancy, mostly to women with liver disorders.

So now I just wait. I am waiting to hear from my OB about what I should do.....induce or c-section because of possibility of ICP or Acute fatty liver, or c-section because it's less transmittable, or c-section because of placental contraction of the disease.....

And waiting to hear from my hepatologist.....did the levels go up because of pregnancy? Should I start an antiviral treatment for the next 4 weeks to decrease my viral load so that it's less likely for him to contract it from me? Should I come see him sooner than my scheduled appt? How can I make it known how incredibly urgent it is that he get the immune globulin shot ASAP when he's born to the pediatrician on staff at the hospital? Should I be worried about myself? Will I need to go on treatment after he's born, or get another liver biopsy (worse than labor, I swear)?

And the icing on the cake.....I won't be able to find out whether he is hep b free until he is a year old.

34 weeks!

PregnancyStats:

How Far Along: 33 weeks
Total Weight Gain/Loss: As of Wednesday (my most recent appt) it said I gained 4 lbs....which would make me a giant 38lbs heavier....BUT I had on jeans, uggs....etc, so I say maybe only 2 lbs gained for a total of 36 :-)
Maternity Clothes: Well Missouri weather is being itself so I've been between sundresses and jeans and my columbia!! I can't wait to feel comfortable in some of my old clothes!
Best Moment this week: When I was told by my OB that my son is going to be a giant! NOT! That sounds even worse than my first labor! BUT! I was excited to hear that if I'm progessing around 38 weeks, that he'll induce me at 39 if he thinks Liam will be too big!!
Gender: Allllll boy....it's been verified 3 times!
Movement: He still chooses to kick me on the right side of my rib cage. And the pain is almost unbearable. It's like an indian burn (when someone twists your arm with their hands going opposite directions) that's constantly burning along with sharp jabs to a bruised rib cage and bruised liver!!
Food Craving: I can still eat nachos at anytime of the day. This week I really wanted a hamburger.....like a lot. So I had one :-)
What I miss: SLEEP! I'm in the beginnings of Insomnia. I don't like it.
Sleep: What sleep??
What I am looking forward to: Him actually being here and getting to hold him and seeing Sydni's reaction to meeting her baby brother! The countdown is on!!
Symptoms: Besides the rib pain, not much. Just getting quite uncomfortable. My feet, particularly my left foot, has gotten a little bit swollen by the end of the day, but it's very minimal.
Exercise: My exercise is rolling over in bed and walking to the kitchen...whew....I get tired easily! I'm not used to all of this extra weight!!

I can't wait until he's here!!! Only.......39 more days if he stays in for 40 weeks!! Otherwise more like 25-30 if he comes when I think he will!!!!

Things I'm loving right now....

First and foremost...HELLO FALL!

1. Okay, so I love fall.....not too cold, not too hot. Perfect! Thank you Missouri for giving me Fall 47 times a year :-)


2. Fall reminds me of Pumpkin Spice Lattes which I love!!! I also enjoy an occasional Mocha Frappuccino. Thank you Fall!!


3. Normally I love sweaters and Jeans and warm boots, but I will currently settle for maternity jeans, long sleeve shirts and of course, my UGGS!!!!!!! My feet couldn't be happier!! P.S These are my favorite kind, and I have them in gray and brown!!! A new pair will shortly be mine!!


4. Scarves! Enough said!!! You can wear them 36 ways and there are so many different styles to choose from!!!


5. The idea that all of the holidays are approaching! I love Halloween! I like seeing all the kiddos dressed up and excited to be out on such a fun night! P.S Sydni is going to be a poodle girl! It's the cutest costume (minus the little girl in the picture....of course Sydni is cuter than that!) And we bought our own glasses, and they're black, and we had a pink scarf at home!!! I love Thanksgiving, besides the delicious turkey and pumpkin pie, I can always be reminded of how thankful I am for all that I have. And Christmas! Nothing is better than watching your child (soon to be children) on Christmas morning!


5. How I Met Your Mother. It's one of my top 5. 1st- Friends. 2nd- How I Met Your Mother. 3rd- Everybody Loves Raymond. 4th- Two and a Half Men. 5th- King of Queens.
I LOVE Jason Segel :-)


6. And of course I'm loving the idea that Mr. Liam will be here before I know it! 6 weeks if I go 40 weeks, 3 weeks if I go at 37 weeks!!! AHH!!!! I can't wait!!!!!!

Baby bump pictures

So here are some pictures from a while ago, up to now, too. Man, I look like a giant. OH WELL! It's worth it!
22 Weeks

23 Weeks

26 Weeks

28 Weeks

32 Weeks

33 Weeks