My Grandpa

My Grandpa's memorial service was today in Minnesota. Jimmy, Sydni, Liam and I were supposed to fly up there last night. I struggled all day yesterday trying to decide whether or not we should make the trip with the pending weather. And the later it got, the worse the forecast got. I called my mom (who was already in Minnesota) late (around 12am) and tried to talk through what would be best. I was so concerned about being snowed in there because they were expecting 6-8 inches on top of what they have (25 inches) and we were expecting the worst storm in history. I also didn't want to get stuck in the air with my 6 year old and my new baby, or stuck in an airport in the same situation. But I soooooo wanted to be there with and for my family. Everyone was coming, including family I hadn't seen in over 10 years. And I wanted to see my Grandma so bad. She is also very ill and isn't expected to be around much longer. She was so excited to see Sydni and especially Liam because she hasn't met him yet. And I felt like if I didn't go, not only was I letting my family down, but also my Grandpa (who never got to meet Liam), but my Grandma, too.

My mom told me to cancel our flights and stay home. It was safer for us and we'd all feel guilty of something bad happened. It's what I needed to hear. I think I was waiting for my mom to tell me it was okay to stay home, however stupid that sounds. So I cancelled the flights. I called my Grandma yesterday to talk to her about everything. I told her how sorry I was, and how I felt so bad that I couldn't be there. And she said, "don't worry about it. I will see you soon. What's most important is that you guys are safe and the kids are safe." I needed to hear my Grandma say it more than anything....that it was okay that I wasn't there. I told her I loved her and I would see her as soon as I could and that I would be thinking of everyone, especially her, today at 2pm when the service started. She said, "Oh thank you Katie." My Grandma is so sweet. Honest, caring and sweet. Did I mention that they were married for 62 years? They were the sweetest couple. They bickered, but in a loving way!

I asked my mom how the service was and she said it was great. It was held in the retirement center that they live in. She said about 75 people came. She read a letter that one of my Grandpa's nurses wrote about him and she said it was a tear-jerker. I haven't read it yet, but I'll share it when I get a copy of it. It's weird because I had a dream on Saturday night (when I decided to cancel the trip) and I can't remember any of it, but my Grandpa was in it. I think it was him telling me it was okay that I wasn't there and that he understood I had to do what was best for my family.

I know he's watching out for us.